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Sarah Palin

Sarah Palin, the formerly unknown Republican VP Candidate, has had reporters in Alaska scouring for background information about her.  Here is some of the things they have found:

1. Sarah Palin doesn’t actually have an accent, it’s distortion from her telepathic broadcast directly into your brain.
   
2. In 2003, the US considered deploying Sarah Palin to Iraq as a 1-woman commando squad, but wanted to make it a fair fight.
3. As head of Alaska’s Nat’l Guard, Sarah Palin taught troops in a training exercise to scare a grenade into not exploding.
4. The diamonds in Sarah Palin’s earrings were crushed with her very hands.
5. Sarah Palin doesn’t have a favorite web framework. She is a web framework.
6. Sarah Palin is the reason compasses point North.
7. Sarah Palin’s enemies are automatically added to the Endangered Species List
8. Sarah Palin is what Willis was talkin’ ’bout
9. Death once had a near-Sarah Palin experience
10. Sarah Palin can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves!
11. Sarah Palin was not flown to Ohio in charter jet- she ran as part of morning workout.
12. N. Alaska is sunny half the year and dark half the year because Sarah Palin needed the reading light, then wanted a nap.

You can read the rest here.

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